Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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