Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
