don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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