how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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