Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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