I want to walk on stilts...naked
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize