wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
