Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
