I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
