i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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