Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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