shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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