I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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