It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
How external is "for external use only"?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
