who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Randomize