Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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