So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
