you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize