About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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