I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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