Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
