I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
