Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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