feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
