um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
