ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
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