i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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