I want to stick my p in your. b.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
