Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
