You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Randomize
