I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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