this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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