fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
