Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
You are a genius and a whore.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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