super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize