Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
