just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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