"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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