Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
