Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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