How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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