Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
