Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
