I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
