girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
