Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
She's the barista slut.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
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