morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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