The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
