Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
