Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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